How to please everyone? You cannot. I cannot. No one in this whole world can. Even Caesar couldn’t please everyone, case and point-Brutus. Just kidding! Yet no one in this ever expanding universe can answer that question. The list of the number of persons to please starts with our parents and academics. Companions, co-workers, etc, all follow soon. But why do we try so hard to please everyone around us?
The modern form of humans only evolved about 200,000 ago, and the civilizations as we know it has been around for only 6000 years. It’s a fact. If you don’t believe me, you can feel free to check out Google. I am sure there are plenty of links to this theory. That is not the point. What I am trying to convey is for most part of our lives we are attempting to do things that are organized by society or people around us. Since childhood, we’re molded in such a fashion that we can stand up in the society and make a name for ourselves and make our nearest and dearest ones proud.
But here’s the hundred million dollar question-Is it what we want in our lives? Is it what we want for ourselves? I mean, sure we need some education to have a basic sense from right to wrong but that doesn’t mean we have to go to school, then college and then universities. Don’t get me wrong, I love my parents. But sometimes it feels like I am not even ME. I am what they wanted me to be, not what I want to be. I am done with my schooling and now I am looking for Undergraduate programs in different college and universities. Again, I’m doing this because they want me to, not because I want to. For real, tell me how many of you can stand up to your parents and tell them-No! I am not doing this. I want to lead my own life, in my own way. I know, I can’t.
I bet the percentage of people doing that is really slim. Hey! don’t take my word for it. My views can definitely be different than yours and I totally respect that. My perception of things may be wrong and yours may be right. But, let me give you an example from my own little world. All along I have been wanting to become a professional gamer but due to some unavoidable circumstances I couldn’t pursue my lifelong dream. Do I regret it? Only all the time. It is hardwired to make believe that when we get a graduate degree the world will be at our feet. Even though many of our parents will decline it but it is what they think. In their mind they think that as long as we get a good job, a decent salary, a nice home and a nice companion, we’re good to go. Maybe, maybe not. But from my own 22 years of experience I have felt that it is wrong to many extents. I have seen people with extraordinary talents and skills roaming around like fools looking for job. I have seen people going mad over the concept of love. I have seen people with home but no one to go back home to. No amount of money, luxury or companionship will be enough as long as we don’t have our peace of mind.
Coming back to the parents part. It is highly unlikely that every parent acts the same way, yet it is highly likely that they do to a certain extent. First they tell us to get through junior school. Very well. We happily do it. Then they tell us that studying rigorously in senior year in high school is is going to be very helpful to get into colleges or Universities. Do we really want that? Anyhow, we do it. We work our butt off for two years in senior high school. Now, people want us to get into a nice college. Some get, some don’t. After all, not everyone is Albert Einstein! Their expectation reaches new heights when we are done with college and the next phase of our life kicks in-work. Again you do WHAT IS EXPECTED OF YOU or rather what THEY EXPECT YOU TO DO.
With all the pain and sweat and long hours of studying and working, where do you see yourself in, say, 20 years? People say that you can change the course of your destiny anytime if you’re willing to. Can we really? I know, after everything, most of the(middle class) people in our society will be working a crappy office job from 9-5. If we get lucky we may even land a nice job with a good salary and great job aspects.
But, it is not what all I wanted to be when I grew up. I’m pretty sure many of you out there think the same way. Now, I wasn’t strong enough to stand up to them. I was a coward. One thing I have understood is you cannot break away from the society easily. It’s not impossible, but it is very hard. If you are willing to, then you should go for it. After 25-20 years in our lives, I bet, none us wants to have any regrets looking back. Moreover, you should be prepared for all the great sacrifices and hardships that comes along with it as a bonus package. I’m not trying to make your will falter. I am merely stating the obvious.
Our society is like a FLOCK OF SHEEP. Once in a while a new one comes along and joins the ride in the same course of direction. It’s monotonicity is overwhelming. There’s no originality. Though it will break many traditional norms and thought process, what we really need is a wolf among us sheep who is ready to make his/her own choices and forge his life in his own way. Oops! That is a really bad example, but you get it right? The feeling is important. Anyway, one thing we need to know is that we cannot walk the same path and be different than others. We’ll have to take a whole new route to do that. After all, our parents or relatives or friends or anyone for that matter are not going to live the life we’re living. The breath we’re taking is our own and no one else’s. We all come alone in this world and believe me when we pass away, there will be no one in that casket with us. It will be just Me, Myself and I.
We are so swept up in not just our thoughts but also of that people around us that we forget that we have only one life and that life is no one’s but ours. We need to make mistakes, fall down, get back up. We need to make this life count. Live it to the fullest. So that one day when people see us they should be like,”Yeah, that guy did it just by himself against all the odds, while enduring all the hardships”. We’re and we’ve been in love with the concept of being in love, to care for everybody else and to be needed. But when it comes to matter of our own and confronting our own emotions, we turn a blind eye to it. We stop being ourselves and start becoming someone else; just to stick around and not get alienated, as if it is the “matured” thing to do. The thing is, time has already passed. We are way past the deadline. We have to break the tradition. It can no longer wait. We cannot just be driven by love and respect. Of course, love is needed and if you can love someone with all your heart that is quite magical. But, we need to stop doing things just because we love or respect somebody. We need to have our own personal space, ideas and decisions. We need to cultivate them, bringing them to life. We need to stand up for ourselves and start crafting our own paths. I just hope that if anyone is reading this, they will try to do what is best for them and not just for the people around them. Of course, we have to care for the people around us, people in our society but I believe that no way we can do good for others if we don’t do right by us first! Then again, it’s just my perception. And hey! I’m just a human.